Thursday, December 14, 2006
Holding onto any vertical or horizontal support, with body squeezed and posture turned as per the space provided, sometimes supported by one leg and sometimes only by one hand, feeling weight of a heel on your foot or both legs, some one's butt pushing your leg to turn and feeling like undergoing a conditioning camp for mountaineering in a chair position, then suddenly feeling your face fitting into under arms of person on side and taking in the all with your next breath, changing face and you meet eyes of the person who you are not sure is pushing his butt for his support or is the person who just smelled your armpits, or is the one looking for the seat available at next stop or is actually person inclined to get off at next stop, but you shift your eyes and meet another glare, and you shift your hands from left to right to hold on to support and say silently 'i'm sorry' and at the same time say 'why don't you get out of here man', suddenly you are aware of your wallet in back pocket, but are relieved because there is enough closeness here to keep you constantly feel that it is secured and then you check that the cell phone in front pocket is as secured with it entangled with a pushing leg, suddenly you feel a drop of perspiration trickling down from you back of head and entering your back and trying to reach downwards but its path is suddenly broken by a dead end board put up by an adjacent hand hitting your back that you don't even feel any pain, but then there is flood oozing out from head and face and sweat dropping down and you don't care where it is coming from and where does it go from there, because you are busy smelling a mixture of odors of drunken mouths and tobacco smoke and you try to cough, but suddenly feel that you need to change your leg position and move from supporting your body on your right leg now,this is what happens in daily bus service, then any new entry at any bus stop, even stoppage, is despised, sometimes silently and many times verbally or physically.
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
I've a cousin. She is 9years old and is very irritating specially with me. Like I'm thorn who pinches her whenever we are together. I'm not sure why but disturbing me with her socks when I'm having lunch or talking damn irritatingly for no reason and that's how my afternoon goes. But one day rather night, I got a dream or call it nightmare, where I'm in front of cousin's mother and I've to tell her that her daughter is dead. This woke me literally from all senses and I was waiting to hug my cousin sister as I met her and now let her irritate me or do anything, but I'm keeping myself at peace. Its all truce. But I was taken aback that how disturbing thought could be. Mind is amazing piece and not at peace.